Book Information
-
This podiobook is complete
Dunkin the Vampire Slayer by Greg Crites
Humor
ADULT: Adult oriented themes, language and situations. Content not suitable for minors.
Click the arrow below to listen to the first episode of this free audio book:
What could possibly bring together a 450 pound vampire slayer, a drunken, acid-tongued detective, a good natured carpenter, bureaucratic vampires, giant anacondas, mutant vampire bats, Ho Hos, Twinkies and more one-liners than a night at the comedy club? Dunkin, the vampire slayer blends all this discordance and more into a hilarious adventure that moves from the muggy heat of Florida to the muggier heat of the Amazon. ....If Carl Hiaasson, Tim Dorsey and Dave Barry collaborated on a vampire story, it may have turned out like this absurd romp.... This is part one of a trilogy.
Hey! This is book one and the introduction of Devlin, hero of three other novels I have perpetrated on an unsuspecting public. Book two, Dunkin the Vampire Slayer: Death Rides A Pale, Pink, Porcine Horse is available at www.veinarmor.com. Book three, Dunkin the Vampire Slayer: It Ain't Over Til the Fat Man Stings is currently undergoing final hackery by me--The Hack!
This work is licensed under a
Creative Commons Attribution-NonCommercial-No Derivatives 3.0 United States License.
Audio Quality: 
Out of 44 ratings
Narration Quality: 
Out of 44 ratings
Writing Quality:
Out of 44 ratings
Overall Rating:
Out of 43 ratings
By: Mike
I started this shortly after getting my MP3 player and it's the first Podiobook that I actually finished. I chalk this up to the fact that I've been listening to so many, but still, it's the first one that I actually finished and it was pretty darn great. It's kinda stupid, but that's not really a bad thing now is it?By: ocm185
Great book - Greg rates up there with Scott Sigler (EarthCore). Man you have to love Devilin. If you are not listening to this book right now - then you must have eat your Ipod like Dunkin -HHHAAARRRRR.By: Ron
Awsome, this and the 2nd book are funniest and most entertaining things that I have come across for years. Cannot wait until number 3 of the trilogy. Keep it up Greg
Chapters
| Title | Description | Date Created |
| Episode 1 (21.96 MB) | Episode One: Chapter One: We meet Devlin for the first time as he is rudely interrupted while drinking. Chapter Two: We meet Ash who is rudely interrupted while working. Chapter Three: We meet Dunkin, then we meet some vampires who are rudely interrupted while sleeping. | Jul 23, 2008 |
| Episode 2 (20.81 MB) | Episode Two: Chapter Four: Dirty Deeds Done Dirt Cheap —Devlin shows why he is so popular among his peers. Chapter Five: All For One and One For All - A twisted corkscrewing of fate brings three strangers together. | Jul 23, 2008 |
| Episode 3 (20.49 MB) | Episode Three: Chapter Six: A Mother’s Love or Cut Me a Willow Switch — Our three intrepid heroes show a united front when Devlin's mother, Aggie, is in danger. | Jul 23, 2008 |
| Episode 4 (23.65 MB) | Episode Four: Chapter Seven: Sugar and Spice and Everything.... Flatulent —We meet the Master Vampire, Creel. Chapter Eight: Potatohead Mythology — Dunkin relates the myth of the Irish Vampire Warrior line. | Jul 23, 2008 |
| Episode 5 (12.15 MB) | Episode Five: Chapter Nine: Can you feel the love? A short chapter wherein Creel plots against Dunkin. | Jul 23, 2008 |
| Episode 6 (22.03 MB) | Episode Six: Chapter Ten: Where oh Where Can the Vampire's Be? — Devlin exhibits the skills that make him a fine detective and drinker. | Jul 23, 2008 |
| Episode 7 (23.15 MB) | Episode Seven: Chapter Eleven: Crowds Make Me Nervous — A first violent encounter, and tragedy strikes. | Jul 23, 2008 |
| Episode 8 (24.29 MB) | Episode Eight: Chapter Twelve: Death, Where Is Thy Sting? Is this the end of the foul-mouthed one? Chapter Thirteen: They Did the Mash, They Did the Vampire-Mash — Creel expresses his anger, then the vampires conduct a strategy meeting. | Jul 23, 2008 |
| Episode 9 (15.25 MB) | Episode Nine: Chapter Fourteen: Roses Are Red, Dunkin Is Huge... —Love strikes from an unlikely source. | Jul 23, 2008 |
| Episode 10 (16.14 MB) | Episode Ten: Chapter Fifteen: What the world needs now.... are a few less vampires. — The start of a big war no one was ready for. | Jul 23, 2008 |
| Episode 11 (28.4 MB) | Episode Eleven: Chapter Sixteen: Stick your head between your legs, and kiss your ass goodbye — The gang encounters more resistance than they expect. Is this the end? Chapter Seventeen: It’s Only a Flesh Wound — A titanic battle. A surprise ally. A disappearing drunk. | Jul 23, 2008 |
| Episode 12 (29.11 MB) | Episode Twelve: Chapter Eighteen: Have A Drink On Me — Devlin makes another poor decision, and this one WILL leave a mark. Chapter Nineteen: I’d Rather Spike, Than Switch — What kind of monster will this be? | Jul 23, 2008 |
| Episode 13 (17.03 MB) | Episode Thirteen: Chapter Twenty: Turn And Face the Strange Changes — Devlin awakens to his new existence. Is he a good monster? | Jul 23, 2008 |
| Episode 14 (24.19 MB) | Episode Fourteen: Chapter Twenty-One: Who You Gonna Call? — The High Council of Vampires have a meeting and agree; Dunkin Must Be Destroyed! | Jul 23, 2008 |
| Episode 15 (24.82 MB) | Episode Fifteen: Chapter Twenty-Two: Your Timing Sucks! — Devlin proves again why he is both a pain-in-the-ass and a valuable member of the team. Chapter Twenty-Three: Row, Row, Row Your Boat — Plotting. Monsters. A trip upriver. | Jul 23, 2008 |
| Episode 16 (29.75 MB) | Episode Sixteen: Chapter Twenty-Four: Riverworld — Unexpected visitors, an ancient gift. Chapter Twenty-Five: Coitus Interruptus Redux...or Coiless Interruptus — Oh is Dunkin pissed now! | Jul 23, 2008 |
| Episode 17 (31.45 MB) | Episode Seventeen: Chapter Twenty-Six: Let's Go Camping — It's Battle Royale time! Chapter Twenty-Seven: Rumble In the Jungle — Is it over? Did we live? | Jul 23, 2008 |
| Episode 18 (15.17 MB) | Episode Eighteen: Chapter Twenty-Eight: A Pound of Flesh — The heroes face a High Council vampire. | Jul 29, 2008 |
| Episode 19 (12.76 MB) | Episode Nineteen: Chapter Twenty-Nine: The Obligatory Chase Scene — Dunkin and crew set off after their nemesis. | Jul 29, 2008 |
| Episode 20 (11.83 MB) | Episode Twenty: Chapter 30: Is This the End? — This is the final chapter of Dunkin the Vampire Slayer: Something Porcine This Way Comes, book one of a trilogy. | Jul 30, 2008 |